Dobri vici...

...

Dober je tale

Jao!

  on je bil ja...

 Tale je moja najljubša tema... Vedno polepša dan...

Možakar pobegne iz zapora, kjer je preždel 15 let. Potika se po podeželju nakar vlomi v neko hišo. Namesto denarja in hrane najde v hiši mlad par. Ker je pobegli zapornik velik in močan, ju
nemudoma oba obvlada in priveže na posteljo. Nato poljubi mlado gospodično na vrat in odide v kopalnico.

Ko zapornik oddide poreče prestrašeni mladi mož takole svoji ženi:  "Draga, v smrtni nevarnosti sva! Tale je očitno zelo nevaren kriminalec  in če se mu bova upirala bova oba ob glavo. Najbrž je bil dolgo v zaporu in pogreša žensko družbo, ker sem ga videl, kako te je poljubil na vrat. Če si želi seksa s tabo, pomisli na najino preživetje in se mu ne upiraj, pa če se ti odnos z njim zdi še tako odvraten. In vedi, draga, ljubim te."

Nakar mu draga odvrne:"Veš, ni me poljubil na vrat. Zašepetal mi je v uho. Povedal mi je, da je peder in da se mu zdiš srčkan. Vprašal me je, kje imava vazelin in povedala sem mu, da je v kopalnici. Bodi močan, dragi, in vedi, da jaz ljubim tebe."

krizaaa!!!

krutooo

A little girl runs out to the backyard where her father is working, and
 asks him:

 "Daddy, what s Sex?"

 OK ... he thinks, this day was bound to come, and I am not going to let
 my little princess learn about Sex from the streets. So, he sits her down,
 and tells her all about the birds and the bees. He tells her about
 conception, sexual intercourse,
 sperms and eggs. He tells her about puberty, menstruation,
 erections, wet dreams.

 Then she asks: "Daddy what is "a couple" ?

 And he carries on: a couple are the two people involved in the sex,
 but this can be two males also, or two females and goes on to
 describe sex etc...

 The father finally asks: "So why did you want to know about "a couple" and
 "Sex"?

 "Oh, mummy said lunch would be ready in a couple of secs" ...

Joj, tale je pa eden boljših

 res eden boljših